What is Divorce?


MINNESOTA REQUIREMENTS FOR DIVORCE

Minnesota has two requirements in order to file a divorce petition:

(1) an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage, and

(2) a residency requirement of living in Minnesota for the last 180 days.



WHAT IS DIVORCE

Divorce originated from the Latin word ‘‘divortium’ which means separation. It can therefore be defined as a decree by the court that a legal marriage recognized by the State no longer exists.

Divorce is experienced by couples irrespective of their social, religious, academic, political, or economic status. Divorce is motivated by uncertainty and changing circumstances[1].

 


 

 

WHY PEOPLE CONSIDER DIVORCE

It is axiomatic that there is no smoke without fire, the same is applicable to divorce. Divorce is one of the most serious social problems in the modern world. It has become very common teaser and it affects all levels of society[2]. In understanding why people consider divorce it is essential to delve into the complications of marital relationships and the various factors that can lead individuals to contemplate ending their marriages. Based on extensive research it is contended that lack of commitment, financial challenges, and infidelity are some of the leading causes of divorce in the world but age and culture may change it all[3]. It is therefore that a marriage which has broken down and is being dissolved should be brought to an end.

A survey in the United States from 2005 which is considered to be the most recent large scale report about the leading causes of divorce in the nation provides the top reasons for divorce and this is to include; lack of commitment, constant arguing or conflict, infidelity, marrying too young, unrealistic expectations about partner or marriage, inequality between partners, inadequate preparation for marriage, domestic violence, financial problems, conflict about domestic work, lack of family support, religious differences.

 

 

COMMON REASONS FOR DIVROCE

 

1.     Infidelity;

Infidelity is defined to mean a voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone who is not his or her spouse.[4] Infidelity remains a significant contributing factor for divorce considerations. The breach of trust and emotional impact caused by extramarital affairs can shatter the foundation of marriage, leading betrayed partners to contemplate ending the relationship.

 

2.     Marital struggles;

Marriage breakdowns often lead to unresolved conflicts, communication issues, and unmet expectations within the relationship. These challenges create a sense of dissatisfaction and emotional distress, prompting individuals to think about divorce as a way to escape or address ongoing problems.

 

3.     Communication Breakdown;

Ineffective pattern characterized by constant conflict, defensiveness, stonewalling, contempt can hinder healthy dialogue between partners, frequent arguments over trivial matters, lack of active listening, diminished emotional intimacy, increased secrecy or dishonesty, feeling unappreciated or ignored, changes in non verbal communications, withholding affection as punishment, lack of conflict resolution. When communication breakdown persists without dissolution, individuals may view divorce as an option to escape ongoing discord.

 

4.      Unfulfilled Needs;

When fundamental needs such as emotional support, intimacy, trust or respect are consistently unmet in marriage, individuals may feel disconnected or unfulfilled, this lack of fulfilment can lead to thoughts of divorce as a means to seek happiness or fulfilment elsewhere.


5.     Lack of compatibility;

Mismatches in goals, values, lifestyle, or personalities can erode the foundation of a marriage over time. Couples who find themselves growing apart or unable to reconcile their differences may consider divorce as a solution when compatibility issues become insurmountable.

 

6.     Family support;

The absence of family support from extended family members or conflicts with in-laws can also strain marriages. Whereby lack of familiar backing or interference from relatives can create tension within the relationship and lead individuals to question the viability of their marriage.

 

7.     Financial stress;

Financial disagreements over money management are common sources of conflict in marriages. Persistent financial stressors can strain relationships and contribute to feelings of instability or resentment, prompting individuals to think about divorce as a way to alleviate financial pressures.


 

BIBLICAL PERSPECTIVE FOR DIVORCE

The Bible provides about what constitutes the legitimate ending of marriage to include death[5], adultery[6], sexual immorality[7], abandonment by spouse[8], treachery of marriage duties[9].

The discussion below portrays about the requirement for divorce based on the ground of malicious desertion or sexual immorality.  The Bible provides that God hates divorce[10]. It is therefore that God hates divorce because he has been through it. He knows the pain of betrayal when the people walked away from his covenant relationships.

 

 

Malicious Desertion

It is also known as abandonment; this is one of the biblical grounds for divorce. This concept is derived from the 1 Corinthians 7:15, which states that “But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.[11] This verse suggests that if a non believing spouse chooses to leave the marriage, the believer is not bound to continue in that marriage.

In cases of malicious desertion, where one spouse willfully abandons the marriage without just cause and refuses to reconcile or fulfill their marital duties, divorce may be considered biblically justifiable.

Sexual immorality

Is another biblical ground for divorce as mentioned in Matthew 5:32, where Jesus states “But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery..[12] This verse indicates that if a spouse engages in sexual immorality, it can be a valid reason for divorce according to biblical teachings. Whereby in this context, sexual immorality refers to any form of sexual activity outside the bounds of marriages between a husband and wife. Adultery is seen as a violation of the marital covenant and can lead to irreparable damage to the relationship.

In summary, according to biblical teachings, divorce is permitted in cases of malicious desertion (abandonment) and sexual immorality (adultery). These grounds are based on specific reference in the Bible that addresses situations where the sanctity of marriage has been violated or broken irreparably. It is dangerous to go beyond what the Bible says as it is stated in 1 Corinthians 4:6 ‘Do not think beyond what is written, that none of you may be puffed up on behalf of one against the other..”

 

 

THE MUSLIM PRACTICE FOR DIVORCE

In Islam, ​it is believed that married life should be filled with mercy, compassion, and tranquility. Marriage is a great blessing. Each partner in the marriage has certain rights and responsibilities, which are to be fulfilled in a loving way in the best interests of the family.

When a marriage is in danger, couples are advised to pursue all possible remedies to rebuild the relationship, whereby divorce is allowed as a last option, but it is discouraged. It was narrated from  Abdullah bin Umar that Muhammad once said, “Of all the lawful things, divorce is the most hated by Allah.”[13]

It is therefore that the Quran allows spouses to put marriage to an end when marital harmony can not be attained.  It goes further to provide that if the husband has pronounced three divorces he forfeits his right to keep her as his wife[14]. Therefore the marriage has to undergo the ending procedures which is known as talaq. The word talaq means "freeing or undoing the knot" (Imam Raghib). It  signifies the dissolution of marriage, or the annulment of its legality is permitted in Islam as a last resort if it is not possible to continue the marriage[15]. Certain steps need to be taken to ensure that all options have been exhausted and both parties are treated with respect and justice.


TYPES OF DIVORCES IN ISLAM AND ISLAMIC COUTNRIES

There are three main types of divorce in Islam which are elaborated herein below:

Talaq

This is a type of divorce in Islam defined as unilateral repudiation of the wife by the husband and does not require the wife’s consent. The husband can pronounce Talaq up to three times, and each time, the wife must observe a waiting period of approximately three months to ensure she is not pregnant. During this period, the husband has the right to take her back unless it is the third such repudiation, which is final and irrevocable.

Khul’ (Divorce for Compensation).

In Islam this type of divorce is where a wife returns her dowery or pays some other sum to her husband in order to obtain a divorce. This type of divorce is irrevocable, and the husband has no right to take her back. In other words, this is a form of no-fault divorce referred to in the Qur’an and Sunnah where the husband’s consent was not stated to be required, in most cases the wife is granted the ability to divorce her husband for the simple reason of incompatibility. The basic principle concerning this, is the verse in which Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

And it is not lawful for you (men) to take back (from your wives) any of your Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) which you have given them, except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allah failure to deal with each other on a fair basis). Then if there is fear that they would not be able to keep the limits ordained by Allah, then there is no sin on either of them if she gives back (the Mahr or a part of it) for her Khul (annulment).” [al-Baqarah 2:229]

When the woman is seeking divorce for no reason, then that is not permissible and the court ruling on divorce in this case does not count for anything in terms of shari’ah. The woman will still remain the wife of the man. This gives rise to a new problem, which is that this woman is regarded as a divorcee in the eyes of the State.

Fasakh (dissolution of marriage)

This is a divorce where the wife has a cause or a reason to seek divorce from the court. This type of divorce is sought if the husband and wife do not mutually consent to divorce or the husband refuses to give Talaq. Sometimes Faskh occurs when there is a significant reason making it necessary or permissible such reason are financial difficulty on the part of the husband, presence of a defect preventing intimacy.

 


 (C) 2024 Kotten Law Firm LLC 

Authors Nitoya Joram and Glen Kotten


[1] Ibid, Asian Journal of Humanities and Social Studies.

[2] Ven B Dhammarama (SIBA-BABL 14-13), Causes and effects of divorce, Buddhist Leadership.

[3] Dr. Danielle McGraw, a licensed clinical psychologist from Scottsdale, Arizona, 2019 research on how divorce can change depending on age.

[4] Owens vs Owens 247 Ga. 139 (1981).

[5] 1 Corinthians 7:39; Romans 7:2-4

[6] Deuteronomy 22:22, Matthew 5: 32

[7] Deuteronomy 24; Matthew 5:33, Matthew 19:9

[8] 1 Corinthians 7

[9] Exodus 21; Esther 1; Malachi 2: 14-16

[10] Malachi 2: 16

[11] 1Corinthians 4:6

[12] Matthew 5:32,

[13] Sunan ibn Majah, the Chapters on Divorce

[14] Surah-At- Talaq 1-12

[15] Kitab Al-Talaq (The Book of Divorce)

 


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